Even as I drown in sorrow, your light reaches me – I see your color despite the clouds that consume me, threatening to extinguish that which has only just begun to spark. Tongues spin their incessant cruelty, cutting me as a blade cuts flesh, exposing the scars that have hardened as stone around my heart, yet your voice is a tincture, healing that which has be so unjustly wrought upon my soul.
They say it’s foolish what I feel, that there is nothing but smoke and mirrors in my emotions, that my goals, my powers of poetic persuasion are nothing more than nonsensical nuisances. I struggle to make them understand, opening my Pandora’s box to let them see inside, yet they treat it as a shop of horrors, full of things unclean and unwanted. Mayhap it is their own fears, their own insecurities that make them so, that have them screaming “Burn the witch!” as I conjure not curses but caterpillars, those that would soon be butterflies despite the flame that catches their fancy.
Maybe it’s my naiveté that refuses to understand how one can mistake fae for fiend, and fiend for fae, how things born of love and beauty can be regarded with such distaste and scorn. I wish to be away from these creatures of discontent, but the shackles of my faults hold me fast, refusing to bend, imprisoning me in a stagnant stall that shows no indication of being broken.
As I remain broken, bloodied, blade rusted and notched, desperately in need of repair. I lay myself in linen for a while, let myself believe that battle was done, but I was in error, for battle shall always be my name, war my constant companion. So I take Freya as my patron, for she favors both blood and beauty, love and war – in this I can be maiden and Morrigan, vengeful bride and fearless fae.
In all of this, you have become my sanctuary. I hope you don’t mind, hope that you are not intimidated or frightened at this prospect from a woman you know next to nothing of. Yet if you know one thing about me know this – until time and times are done, you are ever in my heart, eternally yours. Though land and sea choose to part us, in dreams you shall wake to my kiss.